All the News

To save you some time, I've combined all of the political news into one short article. Here is everything you'll need to know in the coming months...


WASHINGTON, D.C. (BS) -- The President faced increased pressure this week from (Republicans/liberals) who think the administration is moving too (fast/slowly) on the critical issue of (financial regulation/gay rights/global warming/health care reform/Iraq withdrawal). "It's clear to everyone I'm talking to that this administration is doing (too much/nothing). People are (scared/disappointed). Obama is no different than (Hitler/Jimmy Carter/George W. Bush/Dennis Kucinich)!" said one (right-wing talk show host/liberal blogger). "It confirms everything I warned people about during the campaign."

Some commentators pointed to the dominance of the (Anti-/Pro-) Israel lobby over the White House. Others said the problem was caused by the (blame-America-first crowd/Neoconservatives) who control Washington. One thing is clear: If the administration continues its (leftward/rightward) drift, the President risks cementing his reputation as a (fascist/socialist/capitalist-pig/pacifist/war-monger) who seeks to (destroy/expand) America's empire.

Seattle Voter's Guide: 2009 King County Primary

Mail-in ballots are due by Tuesday, August 18, 2009.

KING COUNTY:

King County Executive

Last November, I warned you about Charter Amendment No. 8. Somehow, it passed anyway. Now we must deal with the fallout. One of the amendment's promoters, former local news anchor Susan Hutchison, is now able to run for Executive without having that pesky "Republican" tag next to her name. Ms. Hutchison is a creepy, right-wing activist and theocrat. She's basically Sarah Palin with an extra twenty I.Q. points.

Show Hutchison you won't be fooled. Vote for a candidate that represents King County values.

Vote for Dow Constantine (D!)

JUDICIAL:

Court of Appeals, Division No. 1, District No. 1, Judge Position No. 3

Vote for Anne L. Ellington

PORT OF SEATTLE:

Commissioner, Position No. 3

Vote for Rob Holland

Commissioner, Position No. 4

Vote for Max Vekich

CITY OF SEATTLE:

Referendum No. 1 (Grocery Bag Tax)

Regressive taxation is never the answer. Reducing our plastic waste is an important goal, but we must find a solution that doesn't disproportionately burden working-class consumers.

VOTE "Rejected"

Mayor

Nearly everyone in Seattle is occasionally irritated by our Mayor. We could probably do better, but (surprisingly) none of his challengers have made a compelling argument that they could do better.

Vote for Greg Nickels

Council Position No. 4

Vote for Dorsol Plants

Council Position No. 6

Vote for Marty Kaplan

Council Position No. 8

Vote for Bobby Forch

SEATTLE SCHOOL DISTRICT NO. 1

Director District No. 5

Vote for Mary E. Bass

Director District No. 7

Vote for Betty Patu

Why Twitter?

A few days ago, my son was surfing his favorite website, pbskids.org. Upon running into a glitch, he asked me for help. I was happy to help, but as soon as I made a navigation error he protested. I twice assured him that I knew what I was doing, but then I realized the truth: he was right, and I was wrong. He's three years old. I'm thirty. This marked the beginning of the end.

In recent years, I've grown tired of following the latest technology fads. I suppose my disillusionment started when my Friendster account became passé soon after it was created. Now I realize that I must make more of an effort to be wired. Failure to keep up will result in endless humiliation at the little hands of this new Cylon race we call "our children".

Better Write Your Congressman

[I sent the following letter today to my Senators and Representative in Congress. That should do the trick.]

Dear Congressman McDermott:
My wife and I are constituents from the Sand Point neighborhood in Seattle. We are also proud liberals and consistent Democratic Primary voters. Our nation's current economy and dismal jobs market has directly impacted our family. We know what it is like to stare-down the choice between paying for either daycare or the rent. I'm happy to report that through pluck and luck we will be able to afford both during the month of March, but like many of your constituents, we've learned how fragile our financial security is.

On the bright side, we have great confidence in our new President and his economic agenda. We were very pleased by your vote for the economic stimulus package. Thank you. Nearly all of your Republican colleagues have chosen to put electoral calculations and abstract ideology ahead of our immediate economic plight. I'm afraid many of them, following Rush Limbaugh's leadership, may actually be hoping that our economy worsens. In the face of so many obstacles to our well-being, we hope that you will continue to support our President's economic program. His budget, mortgage and financial markets plans give us great hope for the future. Please do not obstruct the President's efforts to rebuild our country. We don't have a minute to lose.

I've been reflecting on Franklin Roosevelt and the extraordinary support he received from a Democratic Congress. You and your colleagues should demonstrate the same vigor during my generation's depression. I know that all politicians are afraid of being called out-of-touch with their constituents, but during a crisis such as this one we would much rather see you working in DC than holding town halls and such back home. Your voters work more than four days per week, and so should the House and Senate.

In the coming months we will be watching your work closely. During your next primary election, I hope that we will remember this as a moment when you made us proud.

Best regards,
Jared
Seatte, WA

p.s. - Please support voting rights for the people of the District of Columbia.

"Waterboarding is Torture"

Top 10 TV Shows and Movies of 2008

1. Election Night - Obama's victory was the best news I ever got that didn't include the words "not pregnant". I'll never forget where I was: A Seattle brew-pub, having just learned that my wife had just won her first election. Please comment and tell me where you were.
   
2. Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremony (NBC) - An ant-like civilization with a limitless budget can put on quite a show. This was probably the greatest man-made spectacle the world will see for a very long time.
   
3. WALL-E - As Tim said: "The first-half of the movie was high-art." Amen. By any conventional standard, the second-half was damn good also. If WALL-E doesn't win the Oscar for Best Picture, then we will know once and for all that Hollywood values celebrity more than quality.
   
4. Saturday Night Live: Season 34 (NBC) - Tina Fey earned the title of Best Female Comedian Ever, while a pregnant Amy Poehler killed the "mother-humpin' moose". Impersonations of Joe Biden, Keith Olbermann, and Democratic Congressional leaders also killed.
   
5. John Adams (HBO)
6. "A More Perfect Union"
7. The Rachel Maddow Show (MSNBC) -The "Just Enough" pop-culture segments are a total waste of time, but otherwise, Rachel Maddow is a new National Treasure. Her reporting and analysis is frequently as sophisticated as The News Hour, but it's never boring. Thanks Rachel!
   
8. 2008 Republican National Convention - America's loudest hate-orgy since the 1964 Goldwater convention got the right-wing fringe to buy-in. More importantly - as was proven by fundraising figures - the GOP convention united sane Americans behind Obama.
   
9. Synecdoche, New York - I hated watching this movie, but I was also aware that I was seeing something important. This film is a monument. I was haunted by it for days. Watch this unpleasantness... and eat your vegetables, too.
   
10. Recount (Showtime) - Perfect. Laura Dern as Katherine Harris is reason enough to watch this sometimes silly, sometimes painful reenactment of the 2000 Florida tragedy.
    

Cabinet Wishlist

• AGRICULTURE: Gov. Tom Vilsack
• COMMERCE: Indra Nooyi
• DEFENSE: Gen. Wesley Clark
• EDUCATION: Colin Powell
• ENERGY: Sen. Joe Lieberman
• HHS: Gov. Howard Dean
• HOMELAND SECURITY: James Lee Witt
• HUD: Valerie Jarrett
• INTERIOR: Sen. Tom Daschle
• JUSTICE: Gov. Janet Napolitano
• LABOR: Rep. Richard Gephardt
• STATE: Gov. Bill Richardson
• TRANSPORTATION: Rep. Earl Blumenauer
  
• TREASURY: Pres. Tim Geithner
• VETERANS AFFAIRS: Sen. Max Cleland
• EPA: Sen. Barbara Boxer
• U.S. TRADE REPRESENTATIVE: Gov. Gary Locke